Inu Adverts
by White Butterfly
Summary: Pour boredom into a large pan, bring slowly to boil and overactive imagination and a sprinkle of TV adverts. Let cool. In another bowl sift together mixed InuYasha characters and a pinch of nonimpossibility improver. Complete until further notice.
1. Kitty Toys

The first installment of Inu Adverts.  
May be slightly inappropriate for young children or people with torso injuries or the inability to laugh.

General disclaimer: I do not own the rights to any products mentioned, nor do I own the advert scripts and I definitely do NOT own any rights to InuYasha or any associated characters or logos.

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Kitty toys

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Stuff lies scattered all over the clean bathroom. Shampoo, moisturizer, soap, cotton balls, combs and toothbrushes lie all over the sink and the floor. Towels are scattered here and there adding to the chaos.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhh!" Kagome throws up her hands in frustration and throws the small box into the rubbish. She buries her head further into the cabinet but then draws her head out.  
"Ugh! Where can they be!" She marches out of the bathroom leaving it in the current mess. Her school bag is in the hall and she pounces on it, coming up with another empty box. She moans and chucks it behind her as she storms to her room. There she digs into her drawers and desk, only finding more of the empty boxes.  
"This is getting ridiculous!" She marches to the kitchen hoping her mom might know where they've got to.  
"Mo-" She spots her bag lying half unpacked beside the couch. She pounces and starts throwing stuff out in her frantic rush to find what she's looking for. She sits back having finished her exhausting search and looks up. Inu-Yasha's sitting, playing with Buyo, teasing him with something. Kagome sighs but then her eyes zoom in on what Inu-Yasha is teasing Buyo with. She stares at him until he realises she's staring.  
"What!" He looks up as Buyo swats at what he's holding. Kagome just stares at his hand. He realises what she's looking at.  
"Buyo found them in your pack. He was swatting at them trying to get the plastic off. I didn't know you carried cat toys all the time." He continues baiting Buyo until the cat swats it out of his hand.  
Kagome suddenly realises that the floor is scattered with the "cat toys".


	2. Life insurance bumps

A little Rin-Sesshomaru piece originally meant to be totally indifferent on their relationship. But I couldn't help myself.  
Enjoy and Review.

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We need life insurance!

* * *

Sesshomaru hurried onwards through the forest, Rin encouraging Ah and Un to catch up with Jaken trailing far behind. He didn't care if they didn't keep pace with him, not this time, he had somewhere to go...  
KTHUNK  
His looking back had made him run into a tree and at the speed he was going along with how big the tree is he gets knocked out.

Rin and Ah and Un catch up first and see Sesshomaru lying on the ground as if he is asleep. "Lord Sesshomaru it is not the time for a nap! We must hurry to your destination!" She tries to pull him up as Jaken approaches at a run.  
"What has happened you worthless child?" Suddenly Sesshomaru's eye's flutter open.  
"Rin."

Sesshomaru is lying there looking up at Rin. He's never realised how pretty she is. Maybe when she is older...  
BLINK  
Rin appears before him, a radiant beauty looking at him carefully through deep rosewood eyes.  
"Lord Sesshomaru! Are you alright?" she asks, her lips murmuring softly against each other.  
BLINK  
Rin is dressed in a brilliant white kimono with golden cranes embroidered on it. Sesshomaru sees he's wearing a similar kimono.  
"Rin.."  
BLINK  
Rin is tugging his hand, pulling him.  
"We must be going!" Sesshomaru sees a castle rise up in front of him. It feels like home with it's courtyard and many rooms. Sesshomaru can hear Jaken shouting to them.  
"My Lord! You've come back!"  
BLINK  
Rin is holding a small bundle with black hair which is crying loudly. He can see tips of snow coloured ears peek over the blanket. Jaken is being besieged by a white haired child with dark eyes and red marks on it's cheeks.  
"You worthless child!" Jaken yells at the toddler harrassing him.  
BLINK  
He's battling a terrifying demon who wishes to dine on human and _hanyou_ flesh. Rin is shouting at him from somewhere in the trees.  
"Sesshomaru!" The demon's claws go through his heart, tearing him apart, spraying his blood over the clearing, over his beloved Rin.  
BLINK  
Rin is crying, her eyes filled with tears, light reflecting off the beads of water. Her sobbing and the children's' wailing saddens him.

Sesshomaru's eyes brighten, their gaze steady now.  
"Lord Sesshomaru! You are awake!" Rin yells at him, hurling a hug at him. He peels her off and stares into her eyes, gripping her shoulders tightly.  
"We need to protect the children, the castle, the future of the Western lands! I need to make sure you will be protected, our children, the lands! We need," he pauses slightly not knowing what the following phrase means, "we need life insurance!" He shakes Rin so that she understands this matter's importance.  
"My lord are you sure you are not badly hurt?" Rin wriggles out of his grasp, frightened at his outburst about children.  
"You are talking nonsense milord!" Jaken screeches beside him.

Sesshomaru blinks heavily again, clearing his head.  
"What are you talking about Jaken?" The mighty dog lord picks himself up and stares at his diminutive retainer.  
"You were babbling about children and life surance and all manner of other nonsense!" babbled Jaken back at him.  
"You were talking about how we needed to protect the children and me and the future. What do you mean by that milord? What do you mean by our children and life in-sure-ance?" Rin's face was confused and tears of confusion were already running with those of concern.  
"I must have been knocked out and confused to talk such nonsense. I must not waste much more time standing here." he assures them, though he too, is confused at this vision. He waits until Rin has mounted on Ah and Un's back before moving towards his destination, this time at a slightly slower pace.

_'Mind you, it is a good idea.' _Sesshomaru looks behind him thoughtfully. _"I wonder where I can get this life insure-ance.' _He concentrates on not running into anymore trees, the image of Rin on Ah and Un's back fixed in his mind.

We all need life insurance, particularly if you have a partner, children, a house, a mortgage. And the younger you are the cheaper it is. Call us today to see how you can protect your future. Special rates apply for demons under 300 years.


	3. Rolly out of control

I read another fanfic a while ago and while this is on the same product it's a different ad (by the same people).  
That and the fact that since Inu-Yasha is a dog demon and the original was a dog I couldn't help myself.

Special disclaimer (In conjunction with the general disclaimer at Chapter 1): I do not own the rights to this particular product or any associated logos, devices or names, nor the original script or advert.

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Rolly out of control

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"Inu-Yasha!" Kagome yells at the half-demon.  
"Why shouldn't I? I'm helping aren't I?"  
Her eyebrow twitches. "Yes you are but that's not the best way to do it." She takes the package he hands her and settles it in the boot of the car.  
"And why not?"  
"Because you're not supposed to sit in the shopping cart!"  
"So what? I doesn't say that older people can't sit in the cart itself." He leans back in the almost empty shopping cart as Kagome fishes another bag out of it.  
"It's a shopping cart! Not some weird type of horse!" Kagome slams the boot shut and turns to him.  
"You ride that metal horse of yours and it isn't so different."  
Kagome glares at him for pointing that out. "That is a bicycle, this is a shopping cart. Now will you put it away for me!"  
"Jeez, don't get so angry about it Kagome." He gets up but the parking lot slopes downhill and his weight pushes the cart forwards. "KAGOME! HELP!" Inu-Yasha loses his balance and he lands back in the cart,facing the direction he's heading in.  
"AAAHHHHHH!" He's about to slam into the entrance when he grabs the sides of the cart, trying to stop it. "KAGOME!" He closes his eyes and grips the sides of the cart tighter, steering the cart into the supermarket.  
"INU-YASHA! COME BACK HERE!" Kagome starts to run after him as he crashes through to the supermarket.  
Inu-Yasha grips the sides tightly, steering the cart somehow, swerving around people and crashing through displays. He speeds through a plastic curtain and launches into the loading bay.  
"KAGOME! YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR THIS!"  
Inu-Yasha zooms through the loading bay, moving towards the exit. He travels through a open truck, underneath a forklift and then he spots what's coming up. A truck being unloaded, and he's going to crash right into the back.  
"AAAAAAHHHHHHH!" The trolley trips over the ramp and catapults him into the load.  
Inu-Yasha sticks his head up from the mess he's in. It didn't even knock him out, in fact it's quite soft...  
"What?" He looks at the unloader and Kagome. They start laughing and he looks at what he landed in. All of the packaging has burst open but a plastic wrapping is lying in front of him. On it is a dog in very much the same position, buried in a WHOLE lot of toilet paper.


End file.
